MY DEAR WIFE

Over the last few years I have observed with pleasure my mum and dad grow beautifully together. I have seen them have marital squabbles severally and yet got over it easily (I’m not sure how they do it)

As I sit at my desk in the study of my one room self contain, illuminated by a single white electric bulb holding on firmly to its holder in the center of the ply wood ceiling, with my mind running fast and wide, I thought of how far my parents had come in marriage.  I want to also go further, so I decided to write a letter to my future wife. Here it goes:

                                                 

My Dear Wife,

This year has really been a tough one for me but thinking about you gives me so much joy to put in writing these words to you. I know it sounds crazy really to do this but wherever you are and whoever you are, know this; I’m looking forward to meeting you sooner than later because I’m brutally in love with you so we get to know each other then formalization will take place. Before that however, there are a few things I would like you to take note of. Here we go:

I am not perfect therefore I don’t expect that you are. I strive to do my best each given day so I hope you do same.

Please expect neither a fun filled marriage life nor a boring life. I will do well to balance it. Life is already complicated so do you best and leave the rest to God. Let’s make things as simple as we can.

Don’t worry if you culinary skills are terrible. I eat plenty salt and pepper if that will be the problem. I will by the way share with you what I know how to do best. “Angua Mo”(Braised Rice) and pepper with a rice cooker of course. The last time I tried charcoal, I got my hands burnt.

My Dear, I have no idea how many kids you might want to have but I am looking forward to fathering three of them. I pray they all look like me. Two boys and a girl. I will teach her to ride a bicycle, then a motor bike and even teach her to drive a truck. So prepare to nurse the bruises and oh the boys will be playing soccer which I didn’t do much as a kid or engage in a trade whilst in school.

I have decided also not to be a businessman or a lawyer or doctor but a University teacher. Get ready to be my first student each morning before I leave for school. I have chosen this career path so that taking care of the kids will not be done majorly by you only. This is so because I don’t want your wonderful career to suffer. Follow your passion. You have my total support. I want to be part of that process.

Intimately, we shall be a fabulous pair, we will talk about any and everything in all subject areas. Learn how to play video games and scrabbles as well as soccer because I have started watching telenovela though I don’t enjoy them.

Our lives sweetheart will always radiate warmth. It will be a wonder to many. Our home, a solace for strangers, our kitchen a respite for the thirsty and hungry and our hearts shall be warmer than my mum’s “dades3n”. Remember also, that I will stop at nothing to constructively critique you if the need be. And if I do, don’t hate me. I have an obligation to the truth with you. I’m ever ready for the late night chats, the snore (I hope you don’t snore) and the killer looks when I go wrong.

My domestic dictator, I promise to love you fondly like Christ loved the church. I promise again to be a wonderful husband to you and a father to our three kids. Forgive me when I drink sometimes. It will only be beer and I promise to add peanut so I can kiss you on my return home. I will make it a habit to kiss you every morning and night before bed. I could go on writing but I know how much you don’t like reading long essays so I will end here but will continue when me meet face to face. Be careful not to look into my face whilst we talk else I shall be confused.

Finally, I hope you keep yourself well. Please stay away from these guys. They are only interested in getting into your pants 😊. Be sure to wear little or no makeup when we meet sooner or later. I will remember you in my conversation with God each blessed day. So until when you decide to say YES, I love you till THE END.

Your Husband In Waiting,

K. Oteng.